I mowed the lawn today. No big deal. Except that the neighbours dog had left me a mesage on my lawn. The message said quite clearly, that because I'm not allowed to have fence to the front garden, he will come and shit on it whenever he likes.
I pointed out the turd to my neighbour, and complained that his dog had shit on my lawn. His attitude was less than helpful - "You don't have to pick it up, just run it over with the mower if it bothers you."
I took him at his word. Have you ever done that though? The smell is bad, but that's not the worse thing. The noise it makes! It's a sort of crunchy noise at first, but then a sort of splat - with a lot of yelping, howling and whining thereafter. And the fuss the neighbour made. I mean it wasn't even a pedigree dog or anything. But it won't be shitting on my lawn any more.
Not unless dogs have nine lives too.
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