Are we becoming a nation of Dorothys? There was a time when men were real men, and women were real women. And real men were real frightened of real women.
Now it seems that real men are on the decline.
I consider myself to be a real man. I am not afraid, for example, to go downstairs in the dead of night, to investigate a strange noise, wearing nothing but my underpants, and armed with an ineffective makeshift weapon picked up on the way, usually a soft toy or a bedside lamp or something, knowing that armed burglars may await me. But I fear I am in the minority.
I blame women for this. Because whilst they all want real men to keep them safe and secure, they don't want us to eat red meat, drink beer or fart, which are basic real man ingredients. They also don't want us to take risks, which is what real men do. Eating meat is what distinguishes us from the animals. Well the vegetarian animals at least. Cows and sheep are never going to be feared in the same way as their meat eating cousins Lions and Tigers etc. Eating red meat is basically a man thing - it is risky, particularly if not cooked properly, as in when we barbeque it, rather than letting a woman cook it properly. It could lead to heart attacks and stuff, but real men don't fear such minor trivialities - better to burn out than to fade away.
Women's attitude is best demonstrated in their attitude to child safety. I have two children, a boy child and a girl child. The girl child likes fluffy things, pink, warmness, dressing up, playing with dolls and all the traditional sort of girly things that girls do. This is normal and was not forced upon her - it's her choice. If in later life she chooses to ride a motorcycle, that will be her choice too. She'll ride it over my dead body, and having seen her on a cycle, this is highly likely, but it will be her choice, that's the point.
The boy child, conversely, like doing traditionally boy child type things. He likes mud, cycling, climbing trees, being sick, farting, sausages, etc etc. This is also good. It is normal.
However, woman does not like this. She realises that climbing trees is risky. Therefore she instructs man to make the trees safe so that boy child cannot harm himself. Put a fence around it, cut off the lower branches or better still cut it down altogether. There are apples on the top of the tree, which will tempt small boy child to climb it - remove all the apples. (this is on the verge of getting biblical now so I will stop)
Man however has a different attitude. Climb the tree he says. Why? Because it's there. You will do one of three things. You will learn how to climb trees, you will learn how to fall out of trees or you will learn not to climb trees. You cannot avoid risk and be a man. Man thrives on risk. This is important. Because without that simple knowledge, you will turn into a Dorothy. And you will surely be stabbed in your bed by a burglar.
Wednesday, 29 February 2012
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